Sometimes I would get after my siblings for not doing their job. Like I had much say; I hardly ever did my job either. Those times where we would all have to clean seemed like the most boring moments ever. However, as I look back at those moments, I realize they can be one of the most cherished moments.
Our family is huge into yard work. Both my parents were farmers, so they loved the big space in the backyard. We bought a home with a fairly large size yard; half of the yard we turned into a garden and still had a lot of space to plant grass and play volleyball! I remember the way my mom had organized how we were going to work on our yard was we all had to go weed for an hour everyday in the summertime. To me an hour was hell; I hated it so much. Both my parents strongly encouraged it however, and I know now that from that my relationships with my siblings have grown for the better.
In the book "Successful Marriages and Families: Proclamation Principles and Research Perspectives", one student shares their experiences in working in the yard with their dad: "Some of the best times with my dad were when I would help him do yard work...We'd have some of our best talks about life as we raked leaves or hauled wood." Another student said, "I think picking strawberries and string beans was especially productive as a family because the work was long and mundane. The quiet, almost mentally effortless work is fertile soil for conversation. I sometimes miss those days"(pp. 213-224).
My siblings and I have spent time together in the yard pulling weeds, sometimes getting discouraged with one another. Sometimes it would seem like working alone was our best bet. But there were plenty of times where my mom encouraged everyone to go outside to help with a big project and I'm so grateful she had us to that. I am now closer to my siblings in our relationships.
I would watch both my parents as they would work on the yard together; it seemed like the majority of the time my mom would order him around as to how she wishes it to be done. My dad being loyal to her would follow her lead and respect her for what she wanted. Him doing this to my mom shows me more of what kind of man I should look for as I get older and search for a husband. He has showed me through his example important characteristics to keep in mind, and as a daughter that means a lot to me. A daughter certainly needs to know and understand one time or another how men should treat and respect them. In today's society with the growing lack of father figures in the home, that important detail of a daughter's exemplar is fading. It's so crucial for a girl to really know and if possible see the ways where they see how men should treat them so they can find a good one to marry.
"Father's actions influence their children's attitudes toward family work. A father who assumes responsibility for a single significant daily task, such as washing the dishes, and actively gathers his children to help him, is a powerful example of partnership and service within his home"(pp. 213-224). "If a man cannot learn in this life to appreciate a wife and do his duty by her, in properly taking care of her, he need not expect to be given one in the hereafter"(pp. 213-224).
"Family work is humbling, helping us to acknowledge our unavoidable interdependence and encouraging us to sacrifice self for the welfare of others in the pattern of the Savior"(pp. 213-224).
Sources:
Bahr, K., Manwaring, K., Loveless, C., & Bahr, E. (2012). The Meanings and Blessings of Family Work. In Successful Marriages and Families: Proclamation Principles and Research Perspectives (pp. 213-224). Provo, Utah: Brigham Young University.
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